3) We can laugh at ALMOST anything.
And really, it’s because we have had to make the choice between laughing, or hoping there is a padded cell available, on multiple occasions. When we realize we will be giving birth to another human being while our spouse is deployed… we laugh. When the orders for our next duty station get changed to the opposite coast two days before the packers come… we laugh.
When the car spontaneously sets itself on fire in our driveway two weeks into yet another training where our spouse is gone… we laugh. And when all four tires on the vehicle carrying three kids, two dogs, a goldfish and the family photo albums blow out on a highway somewhere along the way during a PCS move… we laugh.
Okay, so maybe we cry (a lot) at first. But we soon realize that crying our eyeballs out on the side of the road isn’t going to get us to our new home. We better learn to laugh it off, figure out a plan Z, and get back on track!
2) We are used to not getting our way.
It is really hard for some of us to adjust, but we learned a long time ago that we were going to have little control over large parts of our lives. We are used to making plans, only to be told that the needs of the military supersede them.
We shake our heads when we hear civilians say “I could never let my husband be gone that long,” or “I wouldn’t be able to live in a house that small,” or “There is no way I could ever move to Alaska!” And even though we have to give up control over some pretty big areas in life… we know there are important things that can never be taken from us. Like our resolve to make our families strong despite the challenges, our love for one another, and our attitude in dealing with anything that might come our way.
1) We are fiercely patriotic.
Please understand that I mean zero disrespect when I say this. There are vast numbers of people in America who love their country, are very proud of her and serve her in many incredible ways. The majority of them have never been a part of a military family.
But I believe our patriotism (especially over the past 10 years) comes from a different place. It’s not because we love America more, or are any better than anyone else. It’s because we live and breathe the meaning of service to country every single day. We share our grocery store with war veterans, we share our medical clinics with wounded warriors, and we share our communities with young widows and their children.
We are immersed in a culture that is constantly reminding us of some of the most powerful symbols of our freedom. Military uniforms, fighter jets flying overhead, colors presented every day, homecoming banners clinging to fences, and little children proudly wearing tee-shirts with a unit or branch of service displayed. Perhaps we get a little more irritated when someone doesn’t remove their hat during the National Anthem, or when entire groups of people no longer stand as the American Flag passes them in a parade.
Many people have forgotten these patriotic gestures, and it may very well be because life has become hectic and they have gotten lost in the shuffle. But for the military family, it is very hard to forget what that anthem or the flag stand for; after all, our loved ones have committed their lives to defending them.
There was a time when I took offense when non-military folks would fail to understand what my family was going through. It’s easy to do. But over time I have learned that there are many different people that I have a hard time understanding because I am simply not wearing their shoes day in and day out.
That’s all it is. We are living this life, not them.
Of course we are the ones who get it. So I no longer begrudge our civilian counterparts their differences and can even find that we have many similarities. But I cherish the things that make my military family unique. This life may be totally different than I ever expected. It may continue to be filled with obstacles to overcome and challenges to tackle. But the blessings and joys far surpass any of the negatives. I am so proud to be a part of a military family.
