Is money the only indicator of success?
Speaking in generalities, society has long attached the value of individual worth to monetary gain. Would the world revere and praise Jay more openly if he identified solely as Jay: the veteran and lawyer or Jay: the stay at home dad aka the social unicorn? As much as we’d like to think otherwise, the former is the silently agreed upon definition of individual success regardless of gender.
Do stay at home dads struggle with the same issues often perpetuated by stay at home moms? Are the side effects of sporadic episodes of self-identity loss, feelings of insignificance, and self-doubt experienced by males if placed in the same circumstances? Yet bet your bottom dollar they are. Once I received a text message from Jay indicating that the only thing he had accomplished that day was keeping his kids alive. After I applauded him, we joked about how we were going to start our own website entitled: www.howmykidsruinedmydreams.com. It was after this sarcastic business pitch that he dropped the bomb that his wife was pregnant again (obviously a good thing ). “I’m never going to leave the house,” he jokingly said. I feel you brother…I feel you.
I clap, you clap.
Parenting is quite literally the most important and thankless job on the planet. I don’t care if you are Captain America or Mrs. Cleaver- the challenges of keeping miniature humans alive and well are no respecters of persons. The truth is, we need each other. In order to lull the cycle of insignificance and self doubt when it comes to our roles as parents, we need to clap for each other and talk about the good things as well as shed the skin of vulnerability and express the hardships that are so difficult to admit. We need to embrace each other in our many different shades, genders and respected spheres. We’re all just trying to meet the same goal, so let’s rise up as a collective powerhouse and cheer each other along.
