A few years ago, during a December marked by deployment, scattered family members, and a cross-country PCS, we hosted what my kids now call our “Laptop Christmas.”

We gathered in front of the tree, mugs of hot chocolate in hand, while my parents and siblings joined from three different time zones. We opened gifts one by one, read a favorite holiday story aloud, and even paused for a silly long-distance cookie-decorating contest.

It wasn’t traditional, but it was beautiful — connected, intentional, and surprisingly meaningful. And afterward, my oldest said, “This felt like everyone was right here with us.”

That moment reminded me: connection doesn’t depend on geography.
It depends on design.

With a little planning, you can host a virtual holiday gathering that feels warm, personal, and memorable — no matter where the military sends you this year.

Choose the Right Platform & Set Expectations

Lean into tools you already know:

• Zoom
  
• Google Meet
  
• FaceTime
  
• Messenger Rooms
  
• Teams (especially if your family is already familiar with it from remote work)

Then send an invitation with:

• Date & time (in every time zone involved)
  
• Platform link
  
• Dress code or theme (ugly sweaters, matching PJs, etc.)
  
• A short schedule so you’re not guessing on camera

Clear expectations reduce confusion, awkward pauses, and time-zone chaos.

Build a Simple, Shared Experience

You don’t need a complex plan — just one or two shared activities that bond everyone.

Some easy options:

• Open gifts together (one person at a time)
  
• Read a holiday book or scripture passage
  
• Decorate cookies “together”
  
• Share one favorite memory from the year
  
• Show off holiday décor from each home
  
• Play a short virtual game (trivia, Bingo, Kahoot, Scattergories, etc.)

If you want to elevate the experience, send small “connection kits” ahead of time:

• Hot cocoa mix
  
• A handwritten note
  
• A family photo
  
• Stickers for kids
  
• A pinecone ornament from your annual wreath-making tradition

It’s a tiny gesture that creates a shared moment on the call.

Prepare Your Tech Like a Professional

Your remote-work skills come in handy here.

Run a quick checklist:

• Test camera and mic
  
• Choose good lighting
  
• Elevate your laptop for a flattering angle
  
• Use a tidy or festive background
  
• Charge devices fully
  
• Ensure solid Wi-Fi

Encourage everyone else to do the same. A smoother experience increases enjoyment — and decreases frustration.

Structure the Gathering (But Keep It Flexible)

Here’s a simple agenda you can borrow:

00:00–00:10 – Welcome, greetings, warm hellos
00:10–00:20 – Hot chocolate toast & shared update
00:20–00:40 – Activity (gifts, cookies, story, or game)
00:40–00:55 – Each person shares one highlight of the year
00:55–01:00 – Group photo (screenshots encouraged!)

The structure prevents chaos.
The flexibility ensures joy.

Make It Feel Personal — Even Across Screens

Create warmth through intention:

• Wear matching pajamas
  
• Set your phone or camera on a tripod
  
• Display homemade stockings or decorations behind you
  
• Showcase your portable holiday mantlepiece
  
• Create a slideshow of past holiday photos to share on screen

Your home — even your temporary base housing — can feel elevated with small touches.

Offer Space for the Hard Emotions Too

The holidays often bring grief, homesickness, and complex emotions — especially when deployment, distance, or transition are involved.

Acknowledge this openly:

• Let people share what they miss
  
• Validate challenges without minimizing them
  
• Provide moments of tenderness, not perfection

Connection is stronger when it’s authentic.

Make It an Annual Tradition

Many military families host virtual gatherings even when not separated — it keeps grandparents involved, siblings connected, and friendships strong across miles.

Keep it simple, keep it doable, and keep doing it.
Traditions become traditions one year at a time.

Virtual gatherings aren’t a consolation prize.
They’re a powerful, intentional way to create presence where physical presence isn’t possible.

With thoughtful structure and a generous spirit, your online celebration can become one of the most meaningful experiences of the season — one rooted in connection, resilience, and love that spans any distance.