3. I rely on my kids too much when my husband/wife deployed
When one parent is away, the rest of the family has to work together to fill the gaps that are left in his or her absence. The remaining parent cannot do it all alone. Dad was always the person who took the trash to the curb and now one of the kids does it. With a mom who is deployed, your oldest has to watch the younger kids more often. Maybe you have also found yourself sharing way too many of your problems with your son or daughter out of the need to have someone to listen to your worries?
…Before the deployment, have a family meeting to discuss what tasks may need to be taken on in a parent’s absence. Planning is key! Don’t wait until you feel stressed out and begin handing out additional chores on a whim. This situation can be a lesson in responsibility rather than a “mistake.” However, try to keep from adding to your child’s stress by unloading the emotionally heavy stuff on her. Call up a friend of write in a journal instead.
4. I hate to cook family meals, especially during deployments
Do you avoid those pictures people post on Instagram of their incredible dinners? The thought of making dinner after a long day at work or taking care of the kids may seem overwhelming.
…Some people are just hardwired to love cooking. But for the rest of us, deployment dining is a challenge. We don’t have the energy or inclination to cook when there is only one adult in the house. Often, when we try to make change, we strip the pantry or every “unhealthy” food and start making hard-to-do recipes. Think about how you can slowly make changes to move you toward the goal of better eating habits. Start with one dinner a week. Then try healthier snacks. Working on how you eat will help your stress and general attitude so it is a change worth making!
