Pornography is the explicit display of sex designed to entice, arouse, and stimulate erotic thoughts. And it is everywhere. It seems harmless enough. It’s in the media, in our favorite shows (House of Cards, anyone?), on the internet, in our books, in our language, on our phones. It’s enticing, erotic, curiosity-driven, riveting, designed to stimulate our brains and develop fantasy worlds outside of our own reality. And it’s mislabeled as art.
Now, let me be clear: the human body is a fascinating, intriguing, beautiful creation designed for, among other things, attraction and physical stimulation. Sexual intimacy and its devices are part of a human’s design. It is GOOD. It is REAL. It is NATURAL.
But.
Spiraling from what is beautiful and natural to what is poisonous and destructive, such as the act of viewing pornography, can turn dangerous habits into portentous addictions and ruinous behavior that destroys marriages and breaks up families.
And that is not okay.
His discovery of pornography began in high school. A vacant computer in early hours of the morning provided him the access he needed to find an escape from the pressures of adolescence. A few sporadic hours provided him the stimuli he needed for self-gratification, but slowly, steadily, the frequency grew. He planted the seed. Deeply entrenched, the roots took hold and waited for moments of vulnerability and recklessness.
As with other addictions like alcoholism and drug abuse, a person addicted to pornography may not understand that his/her behavior affects others. My husband felt it affected only himself. To him, it was harmless. It hadn’t touched the other realms of his life. Until the vines grew and his secret followed him to college and, eventually, into his marriage. By this time, he looked at pornography so frequently and heavily that it became a part of him. He needed it. He depended on it. He planned how to find it on the computer when I was at work or school. Planned what to watch when I went out of town. What magazines had the maximum exposure? Where could he find which websites had the most erotic images? How could he sneak it so that I wouldn’t find out?
