The Social Media Landscape
We cannot close Pandora’s Box. Journalists are trained to get the story and get it fast. The Navy is competing with news outlets to get the correct information out to the public as quickly as possible so that rumors and wrong information aren’t spread to the masses. Because of this, information regarding mishaps is often deliberately leaked through official channels prior to CACO notification to the next of kin. This small fact is something that many of us do not know; we assume that if the media or the military is reporting about a mishap, the families must already know. And when you add Facebook to the mix, you have people sharing articles and news much faster, much further and wider than a decade ago.
If you happen to find out about a military incident, be gentle in how you share on social media. Remember, the spouses in that unit or squadron might not know the details or who has been involved. Once the names of the deceased have been officially released, you can be sure that the next of kin has been informed. So often we want to share new stories about a mishap because we want to lift that person or that unit up in prayer or good thoughts; we feel like we are doing the right thing. Sadly, you might unknowingly be sending another military spouse into an anxiety-fueled tailspin. It also may lead to speculation and chatter about information that shouldn’t be leaked.
What Can We Do?
Theresa’s advice, should you come across information about a recent military incident, is to say a silent prayer and to wait. If you think you might know the persons involved, consider your relationship with them. In the case of extremely close friends or family, call or visit their house to see if they are OK. If your first instinct is to text: don’t. Even a well-intentioned text can cause panic and anxiety.
As spouses we cannot control the speed in which CACO gets to a family, nor can we control the power the media holds and their rush to get information out to society. The good news is that we can empower and protect one another by using social media responsibly. We can do our best not to spread incomplete and potentially harmful information through our Facebook groups and Twitter feeds, or participate in speculative conversations on Facebook groups, until we are confident that the next of kin has been notified. We can do our part to help ensure that in the future no military spouse finds out she is a widow via social media.
