3. Make time for YOU (and your marriage)
Here’s the number one reason you need to, because you need to be able to live your life in order to help the others you want to. People will pull at you and the days you can get a PJ and wine night, take it!
Don’t feel guilty.
Now we all love our family. Family can, in some cases, demand time before or after they deploy and the hardest thing to communicate is, “I’ve been on my own for more than almost a year and I would like alone time with them.”
I know. I’ve felt selfish many times and decided not to ask and then, I decided that if I don’t get this time with him, when will I?
I am always sharing him. When will anyone let me have him? We saw family every pre and post deployment until this last deployment, where during post deployment I wanted him to myself.
Our family understood and yours will too.
4. We sure do love our friends
Friends from the unknowing military world will love to visit, why?
Because for most locations in our military lives, we can end up in southern California, Florida, Hawaii, South Carolina, etc.
What they tend to forget is that their vacation is still your life. They want to visit the beach everyday, see all the sites and when staying with you it can be tough to balance. Planning can also be hard, because depending on when they want to come and scheduling time – maybe while the other is deployed- can be too much.
The first deployment, I didn’t have any guests, I just stayed busy with my friends on base. The second deployment I had multiple visitors and I over did it.
I got behind with deadlines and my normal routine (that keeps you sane) to accommodate their time zone differences and then felt overwhelmed after they left on playing catch up. It wasn’t their fault, I just took on too much.
Find what works for you and your schedule, so they don’t feel like they didn’t do enough and you don’t feel behind the ball. Maybe limit the amount of visits or time spent staying with you.
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