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Historical Stereotypes: Whiny Dependa or MilSpouse Powerhouse?

MJ Boice by MJ Boice
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WWII

In 1942, Congress passed the Servicemen’s Dependents Allowance Act to augment the pay of enlisted men with families by providing additional funds. But, even back then Congress didn’t provide much consistency with those benefits. Shortly after WWII, that allowance was taken away as they tried to go back to a “single man’s” military, which inevitably affected each family’s lifestyle after that. For many military families, that meant a hand-to-mouth existence. I’m fairly certain that wouldn’t fly in modern society. Especially with all the military organizations, advocates and ‘whiny military spouses’ that exist today.

Even though many men and women still entered military service, most all of them didn’t feel that a military career could offer an adequate standard of living. In 1957, studies showed a mass exodus of young service members that had four to 14 years in. Because of the increasing number of dependents and the potential staffing problem on their hands, military planners began expanding the benefits to provide a sense of security and incentive to enlist or remain in the military.

Everything from basic medical benefits to military pensions were used to entice families to stay in for 20 to 30 years. Enlisted pay rose and allowances for dependents were reinstated. Even the government knew that in order to retain the service member, they had to retain the entire family. By 1975, more than half of all Army personnel were married, and spouses became a fixture in military life.

It was around this time that military spouses began to buck the status quo.

With the rise of the women’s rights movement came a desire to seek more than the old school requirements once expected of the military wife. No longer was she content with existing in the background, where her needs, problems or wants remained hidden.

This new brand of milspouse, and those who succeeded her, gave way to the Military Family Act of 1985, which allowed home-based day care aboard installations. This new breed of Power-House-Spouse helped erect employment programs, education programs and was instrumental in creating Family Service Centers.

The programs, services and benefits that our service members and their families have today were built from the ideas and concerns voiced by military spouses from generations past. Had they listened to this stereotype and considered it valid at all, those benefits may not exist today. We wouldn’t have the National Military Family Association, Blue Star Families, Semper Fi Fund or any of the great organizations that support our service member and their families.

If our current generation of hard-charging milspouses were to conform to those stereotypes today, we wouldn’t have the strong collaborative voices of military spouse writers at Military Spouse, SpouseBUZZ, NextGEN MilSpouse, MilitaryOneClick and all of the other amazing publications that lift our voice for decision-makers to hear. We wouldn’t have individual advocates for EFMP, military healthcare, child care or all of the programs and services designed to retain our military members and keep them ready.

Here’s the thing about whining …whining is just complaining with no action.

The military spouse community doesn’t whine…we get things DONE.

 

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