When the results of the MRI’s came back, it was discovered one side of her brain is bigger than the other, and her brain waves were similar to someone with epilepsy however she does not have epilepsy. The doctors described it as her having “constant seizure activity, with no visible seizures.” There was also a concern that with her brain constantly working and being so active, that one day her brain would start to no longer function as it should. No parent ever wants to hear those words and no parent wants to picture this happening to their innocent baby who does not deserve any of this.
Finally, a genetic doctor came in from another city in Germany to do genetic testing. It was discovered after DNA tests that our daughter has a rare condition called Megalencephaly-capillary malformation syndrome, or MCAP for short. This genetic disorder affects her brain, which makes one side of her brain bigger than the other. This explains why she did not reach milestones, it explains why she has trouble with learning, it explains why her hands and feet were bigger than what doctors considered “normal” for her age. It explains everything.
Nothing prepared us for any of this. What did happen, however, is our family is stronger. And believe it or not, my marriage is stronger. Statistically, military couples have the odds stacked against them. And again, statistically, couples with a special needs child have the odds stacked against them. But this situation made us closer.
There is a positive in every situation, even the one I just described. My daughter went through hell, and our family went through it with her. But, we went through it together and we prevailed. I learned that I need her more than she needs me sometimes, because she helped influence the person I am today, yet another positive from this situation. She has taught me that I need to smile, no matter who critiques her for being different.
It doesn’t matter where you are. It doesn’t matter where the Army sends you. Things are going to happen. What you choose to do with what happens is what either makes you or breaks you. Smiling, even when it hurts, is ok. Crying is even better to get it all out. Praying is a reminder that someone bigger than you and I has your back. And wine, just because it’s necessary.
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