Spouse Confessions: I Am Too Skinny

Editors Note: As with all of the pieces in our Confessions Series, the author will remain anonymous. 

If I have to hear one more time, “Gosh, you are so skinny, you could use a cheeseburger,” I am going to flip out. It’s the same as a person telling an obese person, “Gosh your fat, you could do without that cheeseburger.” Regardless of your body size, it still hurts. You see it. I know it. Yes, I am really skinny!

As I see it, we have many people with different weight issues. Some look at the scale and may say they could lose a few pounds. When I hop on the scale, I’m hoping and praying that I’ve gained a few. I have battled weight gain my entire life. My body mass index tells me that I am underweight. When I was 17, I tried to join the reserves and the recruiter told me there is no way he could send me to Military Entrance Processing Station (MEPS) being so skinny. I needed to go eat some bananas and drink tons of water before being weighed. I thought that was God’s way of telling me the military life was just not for me, so I became a military spouse instead.

I have so many stories about being the skinny girl and how humiliating it can be at times. Each person that I have encountered, I had to voice my opinion to about how it hurts to be made fun of in reverse. One day while at the gym I was on the treadmill. I was just running along minding my business, when this heavy set guy screams behind me to get off the treadmill with my skinny, lack of a better word “butt.” I was mortified. He yelled this out in front of the whole gym. I had no other choice but to slide right on off that treadmill and walk as fast as I could to the nearest exit. He made me feel ashamed of my body. I know I am skinny.  I know that on some places on my body my bones protrude. But that doesn’t make it less hurtful.

I tried to go to GNC and get weight gainer. I did not know that you had to lift weight with it. I was looking for some magic potion the way some overweight people are looking for a magic weight loss pill. Well, taking weight gainer everyday twice day only helped keep my bowels moving. I had to use the bathroom more frequently and it did nothing for me. That was money wasted down the toilet. I tried eating more and more fatty foods. That did not work, the more I ate the more I burned. I could not win for losing.

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