Let us, for one moment take the word “military spouse” out of the equation. Let’s replace it with the word “human being”, just for the sake of this piece. Now, let us all take a moment to think of any word that is used to bash, ridicule or embarrass another human being. There are plenty, I don’t need to give you any examples to make my point here.
Would it be acceptable, in your mind, to use any of these other derogatory terms online when speaking of another human being? Would you want any member of your family, or your friends being called this name? Would it anger or upset you?
Those are questions we must all answer for ourselves, and our answers speak volumes about our character.
The “D” word has become THAT word for our community. The folks who have spent countless hours dedicated to finding folks online they think fit this bill, or stereotyping a group of human beings who they think somehow deserve this title because of a few “bad apples”, have successfully coined an ugly term that is now a part of our culture.
It’s not working to curb any behavior of individuals. It IS being used to paint a picture of an entire community, despite any protest to the contrary. It is doing irreparable harm to the military spouse community. It is making a whole lot of folks, who I believe to be good people caught up in a current trend, look like pretty hateful individuals.
Most importantly, it is a horrible way to treat fellow human beings. There are a lot of serious issues to tackle in this world and in the military community that we are all a part of, even if we are not the ones who signed on the dotted line. The energy spent ridiculing one another could be put to great use in solving these problems.
We are all hurting in some way. None of us are perfect. We all deserve kindness. None of us deserve to be painted in a negative light.
Not even the spouse who might be behaving badly, or the person who decides to go after her online.
Interested in reading more? We recommend this piece: When Strong Things Break
