It makes me wonder, would we even consider questioning this subject outside of the military community? What is it about military life that makes waiting to have children (or to have no children at all) so taboo? In the US in 2011, childless married couples made up 46 percent of all marriages. Within the military community, according to Military OneSource we come in at a low 16.2 percent of the entire military community.
The disheartening fact is that there are really only two demographics that are catered to within the military community: the single service members and families with children.
In the Army, the single soldiers have BOSS (Better Opportunities for Single Soldiers) and the USO, while the families with children have FRG, school and MWR events. We married couples with no children fall into a large gap and are lumped into one category or the other. Most of the time I’m perfectly content to be included with them, but the truth is that sometimes it’s just awkward.
We don’t want to cramp the single people’s style, however my husband’s idea of a good time does not involve 60 children, a bouncy castle and a magician. Don’t get me wrong, I have lots of friends with kids. I go to their birthday parties and offer to babysit. And on the flip side, when my husband invites his single friends over, I am happy to cook a big meal and feign interest as they play Call of Duty or watch The Terminator for the thousandth time.
According to multiple online dictionaries, the traditional definition of the term ‘family’ is parents and their children living under one household. Myself, those who are waiting or those who simply don’t wish to have children, are overlooked when it comes to the term ‘family.’
We started our family on the day we said “I do” and even though there are only two of us right now, it doesn’t make us any less of a family than those with children.
