As military spouses, we’ve been around the block of friendship, business, and life a few times. When this happens, we may lapse into ingrained behaviors and habits that make us feel safe, instead of being open to possibilities. What if, when we find ourselves falling into old patterns, we take a step of courage and try something new. Let’s dig into inclinations we may have, and discover how we can flourish.
Saying Yes immediately
It’s fantastic they want your help at the bake sale, the thrift store, the church, and the Key Spouse program, but do you have time to breathe? Are you making time to learn and grow, and be with your family as well? A well placed yes can get us connected in beautiful ways and plugged into a community we love. Too many yesses can drain our tanks and make us exhausted. Choose your yesses well; you don’t have to be a people pleaser to be a person who pleases others.
Saying No immediately
You may worry you won’t fit in or belong and so you automatically turn down invitations, but people might amaze you. The first spouses club I went to, I expected a rendition of ‘The Real Housewives of Hickam AFB.’ The ladies I met there turned into my best friends during my time at Hickam, and we’ve stayed friends ever since. Many clubs have offshoots like adventure clubs or movie nights. So even if you are nervous about ‘bunco’ night, which is a blast, you might find a new friend!
Assuming you know what’ll happen
As more time passes in the military journey, some things don’t surprise you as much. Oh, broken furniture? Mold problems? Same old, same old. You may also miss your old friends and feel reluctant about new ones, but allow yourself to be surprised. Each base is a new one, with unique people. Staying open and keeping an eye out for engaging events will allow you to keep a fresh perspective instead of becoming weary and distancing yourself.
We all have tendencies we lean towards on occasion. We have these because they have protected us in the past. Remember, as you move to your next base, and are presented with an opportunity, anything is possible. You are a person, a whole person, so allow this military life to continue to teach you new ways to see the world.