Friendship-Dating: Why You Should Befriend Fellow MilSpouses

With every PCS, I’m forced to start dating again. Friendship-dating, that is.

Picture this. A speed dating service for military spouses, but instead of looking for a hot date, the service helps us find friends in a new community. Doesn’t that sound like a wonderful idea? What should we call it? or ?

I just PCS’d – again.

Nothing but boxes and paper and unfinished rooms surround me, my children are bored out of their minds and need more than their mom and Wii to play with.

I don’t know a soul in Ohio.

A few weeks ago, I left the best group of friends and the “Dream Team” of military spouses. Now, I have to start over, again. I’m fantasizing of this imaginary online friendship matching service and if it were real, I would join in a hot second.

Finding and making new friends and re-building my support network after a move is a lot like dating again.

And I HATED the dating scene when I was single.

First, I have to leave the house. New friends are not going to find me while I’m under a ton of cardboard boxes, engulfed in dull brown paper and tripping on random items lying around the house. However, I can’t just wander outside in my ugly yoga pants and torn T-shirt.

No, I actually HAVE to make an effort before I leave the house, because you never know if I might run into a potential friend at Target or the park.

Today is the day, I can’t take it anymore. I need to talk to someone else besides my kids. I put on my cutest “mom” clothes, run a brush through my hair and head out the door with children in tow.

I can do this.

To the park I go, hoping to find a neighbor or another mom to connect with.

I spot someone who has the same age children I have at the park. I take a deep breath, wondering when is the right time to approach her.

What could I ask her to start a conversation?

Maybe she is new, as well?

She could be waiting to find a new bestie, too. I’m so nervous. I frantically review different scenarios and questions in my head, hoping not to sound desperate.

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